永远

我想，没有资格去承诺。

也许，没有自信去面对真相。

我想，人不该活得太清醒。

现实，终究血淋淋的残酷。

不该，逆着风，寻找散落一地的年华。

总是，昧着心， 当个傻子。

我想，已经习惯了不眠的夜。

听着，让人悲从中来的字句。

缅怀，那些错误的美丽。

终日，狼狈地拖着麻痹的身心。

伪装，已经到了炉火纯青的境界。

为何，还未精疲力尽。

我想，这是种惩罚。

嫉妒，被这魔鬼紧紧缠绕着。
 
我想，苦苦挣扎，也不过是想争夺那一席之地。

总是，痴人梦语，向往独占你的一切。

朋友，这词就像个双刃剑，毫不留情地插在心口。

充耳不闻，视而不见，已无法换取片刻安宁。

永远，是永远说不出口的承诺。



.xk

Bad

Love is so bad.

I can never fix it.

Time can never bring away the pain.

I still think of you in the middle of the night.

Will you ever know?

The sleepless nights I have been through.

Your voice came out from nowhere.

It suffocates me when I close my eyes.

There can be a thousand reason to let go.

And the one and only reason not to.

Love is a terminal sickness.



.xk

无法

那是一段被刻意遗忘的过往,

颠覆所有价值观的夏天。

世界随着你的出现乍然崩溃。

炎热的空气让人理不清思绪。

放眼望去是片绿茵茵的草原,

你的身影却格外清晰。

无法轻易离开的视线,

只不过是沦陷的序章。

那阵芬芳并未随着时间流失,

遗香久久缠绕心坎。

桃花依旧笑春风,

那份情却犹如魅影随行。

卑微地乞求着，

无法拥有的你。



.xk

Q&A

It is like Q&A, the more you question yourself, the more confused you are.

Even if you do that 24/7, there is still a high possibility you won't understand.

Maybe there is no right or wrong.

Maybe you can never define the process.

Do you? Do you not? Do you?

Everything you ever wanted is an answer.



.xk

承诺

施舍般的只字片语。

话别总来得突然。

脑海里余音绕梁。

那背影有着不知名的魔力。

让人流连忘返。

霎那烟火的目眩神迷，

却是遥不可及的存在。

回眸一笑是为了谁？

千言万语中，

没有一丝丝承诺。

无望的等待，

犹如无期徒刑。



xk.

怪谈

我们到不了的明天。

如果你并不存在于明天，那就等于你没有未来。

可是肉体活着就代表你有明天么？不竟然吧。

哦不，其实活着就等于希望。希望的前方是未来。

这是很根本的问题。好比鸡先生蛋还是蛋先生鸡。

我想。每个人心中都有个答案。

人类是奇妙的生物，它是如此的美丽，也可以是如此的丑陋。

承认吧，你会被人性的残酷吓得魂不附体。

与此同时，你也被人与人之间的爱深深吸引。

我是个合格的人么？我想这个社会已经悄悄地给与评论。

我们不想被人评价，却又忍不住去批判他人。

在这大染缸里生存最需要的是什么？

是美德？是狡猾？是忍耐？是智慧？

我无从知晓，本人不谙世事。

我在说谎么？那就交给你们去辨别。

你有可能什么都不需要。但是另一个你却必须全数兼备。

人类最终及的进化是什么？

在弱肉强食的世界里，能在苛刻的条件里存活的人们。

他们将拥有什么？

炸毁宇宙的核武器？媲美外星人的智慧？瞬间移动的超能力？让世界和平的意识？养生延年的秘方？

要是这些新进人类在偶然的机会回到21世纪，那它们的存在对我们而言和外星人无异。

那渴望着一切的我们对他们来说又是什么呢？一群低能的怪物？

我是多么殷切的盼望着，这些神人的到来。

来吧，来主导我们这些利欲熏心，幼稚无知，光怪陆离的人们。

怎么说着说着就离题了呢？

也许我才是那个到不了明天的人？



.xk

Cry

i can't feel my tears.

no i can't feel it.

they're raindrops from the sky.

no they didn't come from my heart.

i can't see my tears.

no i can't see it.

they're false reflections from the mirror.

no they didn't exist on my face.

i can't taste my tears.

no i can't taste it.

they're some plain water from the pipe.

no they didn't flow from my eyes.

i didn't cry.

no i didn't cry.

this is a lie.

no i will never tell you the truth.

this is not the end.

just tell me why.

you make me cry.



.xk

Lost

show me the path, when it is leading no where.

show me the light, when it is blinded by sadness.

show me the truth, when it is covered with lies.

show me the future, when it is painted in gray.

can you?



xk.

Life is...

full of decisions.

full of curiosity.

full of tears.

full of happiness.

full of questions.

but the answers are nowhere to be found...



xk.

注视

独自注视着你离去的背影。

不断地告诫自己，这也许是最后一次。

那只不过是矫情而已。

不愿意去承认这难以置信的事实。

一而再，再而三地让行动出卖自己的思想。

换言之身不由己。

看不见的东西就是空想。

思念这玩意儿，却狠狠地掠夺脑袋。

确实吃力不讨好。

偶尔彷徨恐惧的不知该如何是好。

但还是要为了那一丝可能性，咬紧牙根忍下去。

无论如何都放不了手。

尽管你不曾回头那灯火阑珊处。

那风雨无阻彻夜守护着你的人，一直都在。

这只是自我满足的作法。

人总是要到后来的后来才了解。

曾经的年幼无知，是如此的幸福。

或许是想太多。

不懂所谓风花雪月的浪漫。

其实想安静地，陪着你细水长流。

这只是单纯的奢求。

心撕肺裂的注视着你离去的地方。

在一起的每分每秒，依然如此珍贵。

幸福与悲伤从此并存。

那让胸口泛起苦涩的名字。

如此短暂的邂逅，却足以让人致命的伤痛。

这份感情该何去何从？



.xk

声

聞こえないの声･･･

もう会えないから もう会わないから･･･

も伝われない･･･



.xk

Why

this is a long long story.

i dont even know where to start.

it always revolve around you.

why does it have to be you.

when there are thousands and millions of human on earth.

the problem never get solved.

it is always the endless self questioning.

why does it have to be you.

when i already know the answer.

i used to think i ll be satisfied as long as i am by your side.

such a fool i am.

why does it have to be you.

when i understand that we will be nothing more than friend.

i keep telling myself you are slowly disappearing from my world.

but the tears always hide behind the smile.

why does it have to be you.

when i can only live in my memory with you.

i keep my eyes shut.

but i can still see your smiling face.

why does it have to be you.

when everything is fated.



xk.

Nothing better

there is nothing better.

when you are by my side.

there is nothing better.

when you need me by your side.

there is nothing better.

when i can share you happiness and sadness.

there is nothing better.

when you accompany me during the difficult time.

there is nothing better.

when i can act like a child to you.

there is nothing better.

when you just accept every side of me without a word.

there is nothing better.

when i'm strong enough to protect you.

there is nothing better.

when you lean on my shoulder.

there is nothing better.

when i melt into your smiling eyes.

there is nothing better.

when you smile because of me.

there is nothing better.

when everything comes true.

there is nothing better.

nothing better than you.



.xk

Irreversible

a part of me is dying. a part of me is fading. a part of me is lacking.

i don't know why. do i?

when the sun rise, i do whatever i m supposed to do.

when the sun set, i do whatever i wanted to do.

i allow myself to drift in the darkness.

i don't know why. why am i still waiting for you?

people ask me why i'm so addicted to the illusion.

because i can't have you in the reality. but i need to survive.

so i let myself to live in the fantasy. 

i don't know why. why does it goes on and on?

when you appear everything goes off track.

there is no reason or so. nothing else matters.

how long have i been waiting. i lost count.

i don't know why. why do you have to exist in my life?

time flies. almost every little single things around me changes.

except that. except that feelings. useless and meaningless.

yes. i wanted to let go. i do. i really do.

i don't know why. can you tell me why?

you don't even know a thing. don't you.

i can't blame it on you because i'm nothing to you. that's not your fault.

it is my fault for being such a fool. it is not even a joke.

i don't know why. why am i so crazy about you?

a part of my soul yearns for you. can't you tell. obviously not.

because i have been hiding it so damn well.

please don't mind. seriously. it is purely my own mistake.

i don't know why. why can't i let you go?

you are not even mine. you are not even my belongings.

more like you'll never be.

your smile, your breath, your everything. it crucifies me.

i don't know why. why do we meet each other?

when you are not supposed to be mine.

when i'm forbidden to make you mine.

when i don't even have the chance to confess anything.

i don't know why. why do i hate you so much yet...?

i would want to say that three words for a million times. but i can't.

you don't need me.you don't need trouble from me.

i'm too scared to break the balance between us. i'm afraid of losing you forever.

i don't know why.what have you done to me?

when i listen to people's love story. i think of you.

when i listen to the lyrics from love ballads. my tears fall easily.

when i'm by myself. you're always on my mind.

i don't know why. why do i still miss you?

all i can do is just running away from you.

day or night. i won't stop. i can't stop.

praying i'll wake up someday and forget everything. no way.

i don't know why. or maybe i do?

i'm sick of this endless loop.

i know these words will never reach you. but i have to say it.

it is too late to stop now. irreversible.



.xk

烟火


灿烂如烟火，绚丽得令人欲罢不能。

却忘了那一刻，也不过是昙花一现。

那七彩缤纷，有着令人灼伤的高温。

就如飞蛾扑火，不顾一切牺牲奉献。

许下的承诺，更是一场盛大的梦境。

请冷的夜空里，没有留下一丝痕迹。

灯火阑珊处，孑身一人回味着过往。

褪色的记忆里，找不回曾经的感觉。



.xk

自我

放弃自我的人也许无奈。毫无自我的人则是可悲。

介于两者之间的人。。。

哀莫大于心死。

抬头竟是海阔天空。

却找不到自己的栖身之地。

仿佛上帝和你开了个玩笑。

其实你并不属于这个人间。

又或者心底深处暗暗地期待着。

消失才是正确的选择。

低着头迈出的每一步，

到底是为了什么？

你确定你曾经存在过么？

在世人的眼光中，

你是不是另一个他？

庸庸碌碌的岁月里，

你是否留下属于自己的痕迹？

这是无解的问题，因为每个人都有自己的标准答案。

自我的终点，是毁灭还是重生？

别告诉我，矛盾才是人类最根本的习性。



xk.

ラブレター


关于那个人，有很多疑问，无法解开的谜题。

或许是灵魂的支柱，或许是创作的灵感，或许是颓废的根源，或许是荒芜的过去。

或许。。。什么事情都有可能发生，也有可能不会发生。

总是语带疑惑，不想把话说得那么绝对。

现实比什么都来的残酷，在自己幻想的世界里灌注不确定性，难道是罪么？

也或许是个谎言。那个人只不过是虚构的影子，昙花一现，海市蜃楼。

若可以用三言两语就否定一切，那该有多好。

心脏告诉脑袋，那个人的存在，不会被抹煞。

别问为什么，如果你为情字挣扎过，为某个人做尽蠢事，那答案就一目了然。

不是从未对他人心动， 只是学不会放下。

在每双眼睛的深处，都藏着你的笑颜。

回顾近几年写下的词句，赫然发现字里行间都残留着你的身影。

从华丽浮夸的感叹到几近黑暗绝望的呻吟。  如梦初醒。

几个春秋一晃眼就过去，依旧是孑然一身。
 
有个傻子守着一个无法实现的梦。

纵然知道不会有终点，还是义无反顾地爱了。

累了，却停不下来。

吾爱。

这些支离破碎的文字，是专属于你的ラブレター。



 xk.

缠绵不断的青丝烟缕。

那不经意勾勒出的轮廓。

也许是梦里的残念。

日有所思，夜有所梦。

那身影开始频繁地侵占了无梦的夜。

始终不知所措。

嘘よ嘘。

全部嘘なのよ。

誰にも知らない。